


Melancholia

by BlackAngelis



Category: Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Love, M/M, Polyamory, Sibling Incest, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-21
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-18 20:49:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29615232
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackAngelis/pseuds/BlackAngelis
Summary: Tyrion finally comes to terms with his feelings for his siblings.
Relationships: Cersei Lannister/Jaime Lannister, Cersei Lannister/Jaime Lannister/Tyrion Lannister, Cersei Lannister/Tyrion Lannister, Jaime Lannister/Tyrion Lannister
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	Melancholia

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [Melancholia](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29614038) by [BlackAngelis](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackAngelis/pseuds/BlackAngelis). 



Tyrion had been sitting at the bar counter for several hours, where he had never set foot before, and quite unusually, he was still having his first drink, which was all the more surprising since he had just been dumped.

When he had joined his now ex-girlfriend in the early evening, he never for a moment imagined that she would put an end to their not-so-recent relationship - how long had it been going on? A month? Two months? For Tyrion, it was almost a record.

She had criticized him for not being invested enough in their relationship. She had reached out to him, he knew that, she had offered him a chance to promise her that everything was going to change, that he was going to change because he cared about her and didn't want to lose her.

Tyrion smiled ironically at this fresh memory. There was no doubt that he had horribly disappointed her: she had burst into tears and left the bar. And, once again, Tyrion had looked like a heartless jerk. He hadn't tried to catch her. Why would he have done so? He hadn't fallen in love with her. And, damn it, he had tried, though. He had even believed it for a few days: she was pretty, nice, funny, they were having a good time together, wasn't that the definition of love?

The illusion didn't last, of course, because Tyrion knew what love was, and it certainly wasn't that.

Smothering a sigh, he took his cell phone out of his pocket and hesitated only for a moment before dialing one of the only two numbers he knew by heart - and, no, his was not one of them.

"Tyrion?"

His heart missed a beat, his mouth dried up.

"Jaime..."

"Is there a problem?"

It was almost midnight, which probably explained the anxiety he detected in his older brother's voice.

"I'm... I'm in a bar... Can you... can you come and get me?"

Jaime didn't hesitate a second before answering.

"What bar?"

Tyrion gave him the name without being able to repress a small smile.

Jaime was coming to pick him up.

He was going to see Jaime.

A swarm of butterflies flew into his belly.

"I'll be there in twenty minutes."

Tyrion put his phone back on the counter and closed his eyes, dreaming, before a hint of bitterness disturbed his sweet dream.

Yes, he was going to see Jaime. Yes, he was going to see Cersei.

Yes, he was going to feel his heart leap a thousand times in his chest.

And then what?

He would spend the night there and leave at dawn after kissing them on the cheek, more miserable than ever.

He would suffer like a martyr and the worst was that he would ask for more.

He didn't know how he was still holding on.

What he did know was that he was desperately in love with his siblings.

Tyrion didn't know when exactly his brotherly feelings for them had turned into romance. Had it started the day he discovered that the twins were in an incestuous relationship when he was just thirteen years old? Or later, watching them enjoy the perfect love while he was still so alone?

He doubted he would ever find out - they had always been so close together...

On the other hand, he was perfectly aware of the moment when he realized that it wasn't just on the cheek that he wanted to kiss them.

It was last summer, almost a year earlier. One fine morning, Jaime had phoned him to tell him that the three of them were going on vacation to a paradise island off the coast of Dorne. Not for a moment had he thought of refusing.

Maybe he should have.

_The great revelation_ , as he liked to call it, had taken place on their first day there, while they were relaxing on a white sandy beach. Jaime had taken Cersei by the hand and dragged her into the water before splashing her. She had returned the favor, of course, and as Tyrion watched the scene from a distance, something crossed his mind.

_They are beautiful._

He had watched them at length, Jaime with his golden hair and muscles that made every girl he met blush with envy, and then Cersei with her goddess body and a smile to be damned.

When he realized that he was undressing them with his eyes, he turned away, mortified.

But that didn't stop him from doing it again the next day. And the next day. He had wondered what it would be like to see them naked, to caress Jaime's chest and Cersei's breasts, to kiss them on the lips the way they kissed in front of him.

"Tyrion?"

He was startled.

Jaime stood behind him, frowning.

"Are you drunk?"

"No."

He must have seen the melancholic despair in his eyes because he didn't ask why he had called him if he was able to go home alone.

"Come on, let's go."

Tyrion followed him outside the bar to his car and got in silently. As he watched the houses through the window, he withdrew into his shameful thoughts.

One night, when he couldn't sleep, haunted by visions of Cersei and Jaime's perfect bodies, he had heard them making love. It had happened before when he still lived with them in the big family home, but this time everything was different.

An electric shock had passed through his body and, with his heart about to explode, he had stuck his ear to the wall, eager to hear more. His mind was overwhelmed, he had pictured the twins' embracing bodies, their blushed faces, the sweat on their backs, he could hear their moans of pleasure, and he had only one desire, to push the door of their room and join them.

He hadn't, of course.

With his body and cheeks on fire, he had lowered his eyes to the bump that deformed his pajama panties and, knowing how wrong, abnormal, unnatural it was, he had stroked himself, imagining that it was Jaime and Cersei who were touching him like that, making him moan and, really, it had never felt so good.

Tyrion shook his head to get his thoughts straight. He couldn't afford to have such thoughts now, not when his body could betray him in front of Jaime's eyes.

They arrived at their destination far too early for his liking. He tensed up as Jaime gently grabbed his shoulder to guide him inside, and as they walked through the door, he let his fantasies take over for a moment.

If he had thought of feeling only desire for the twins, he soon realized that it was much more than that. He didn't just want to make love with them.

He wanted to walk with them hand in hand, he wanted them to spend afternoons cooking, watching TV huddled together or just hugging and kissing, he wanted them to feel good, he wanted to listen to them tell him about their work day and complain about their colleagues before comforting them with a kiss, he wanted to make them laugh, he wanted to fall asleep and wake up next to them every day.

Tyrion simply wanted to love Cersei and Jaime.

And he wanted them to love him back.

Cersei was sitting at the kitchen table, obviously very worried. She was wearing a robe over her satin nightgown. Tyrion tried not to look at her and sat on a chair. She rushed over to him and gave Jaime a questioning look.

"What happened?"

Tyrion didn't need to look at his brother to know that he had shrugged. Cersei put one hand on Tyrion's arm - his heart immediately began to beat faster.

They would eventually kill him, there was no denying it - he was dying of love for them, a forbidden love. An unspeakable love.

"I've just been dumped."

"Oh..."

Cersei kissed him on the forehead, which was undoubtedly the worst comfort she could give him but, of course, she could not guess it.

"I'm sorry, Tyrion."

"I'm sorry," Jaime repeated.

He resolved to plunge his eyes into the twins' eyes and, as always, he drowned in them with delight. He could read love in their emeralds, concern and compassion, too, all of which made him want to give them sweet, languid kisses.

"It didn't do anything to me," he confessed without really understanding why. "I hadn't fallen in love with her."

When he came back from vacation, he had done everything to get Cersei and Jaime out of his head. To do so, a radical solution had appeared to him: meet someone.

He had started hanging out in bars every night and had put countless girls - and even a few men, by the way - in his bed. He had agreed to see some of his conquests again, eager to feel the delicious thrill that ran through his body when he laid eyes on his siblings.

He had never felt it.

When he spent time with his lovers, all he could think about were the twins, the way they rolled their eyes, bit their lips or laughed. Every sexual intercourse went the same way: inevitably, he would end up wondering what it would be like to stroke Jaime or to bury his face between Cersei's thighs, to kiss them on the neck while moving inside them, to hear them moaning his name as they climaxed, their eyes shining with a love that was stronger than anything.

Jaime smiled kindly at him.

"Don't despair. You'll eventually meet your soulmate."

A bitter smile stretched Tyrion's lips. Jaime had always been so romantic ... he believed that everyone in this world had a soulmate waiting for them somewhere, and he often said that he felt very lucky to have met his own on the day he was born - and even before, for that matter.

"It will never happen."

"Why?" Cersei asked softly.

Tyrion could feel her breath on her face, Jaime's presence behind his back.

And he understood that if he didn't speak now, he would die - he would die of love, killed by his broken heart.

Gathering what little courage he had, he began, knowing full well that what he was about to say could break the strong bond he had with the twins.

He had been struggling for years, struggling against his feelings, against his heart, and he couldn't take it anymore.

It was time to accept what he was feeling, to really accept it, and to stop keeping it to himself.

"Because I've already found my soulmates."

Cersei and Jaime exchanged glances, no doubt puzzled by the use of the plural, but they did not seem shocked - who were they to judge him, they who were united by a supposedly immoral love?

"Then why aren't you with them? "Jaime asked.

"Because I'm sure they'll never love me back."

"You don't know that."

Tyrion did not answer. Instead, he stared at them for a long time, he looked at them as he had never looked at them before, he let the feelings he had so deeply buried deep inside himself reappear - he let them see, he who spent all his time hiding.

And Cersei and Jaime saw, of course.

Jaime sat slowly beside Tyrion, as if stunned.

"You mean..."

Resigned, Tyrion nodded painfully.

"I'm in love with you."

Tears were streaming from the corner of his eyes - he wiped them away angrily.

"I tried to fight it... nothing worked. I love you, I love you so much. I think of you all the time, you haunt my nights and my days. I spend my time daydreaming, imagining myself living beside you. When I see you, I feel like my heart explodes with love. I want to kiss you, to take you in my arms, I want to hug you so badly that it hurts terribly. I feel like I'm dying without you. I love you and it's eating me up inside, a little bit more every day."

If Tyrion had finally let go of what was weighing on his heart, he did not feel any lighter - not when the most deafening silence he had ever heard fell on the room.

When he felt that he was about to burst into tears, he suddenly stood up.

"I... I needed to tell you..."

And he fled upstairs before hiding in the room that had never ceased to be his bedroom, given the number of nights he spent sleeping here. With his heart in pieces, he threw himself on his bed and tried to smother his tears with his pillow.

What was he hoping for? That Cersei and Jaime would throw their arms around his neck and confess that they loved him too? He had ruined everything, that's what he had done.

They would never look at him the same way again. He probably disgusted them. Maybe they were even going to ask him never to set foot in their house again.

After about half an hour, when his tears had dried up and he was resting unwillingly on the bed with his pillow pressed against him, there was a knock on the door.

Jaime's face appeared.

"Tyrion? Can we... can we come in?"

He didn't seem angry. Feeling a lump in his throat, Tyrion nodded and sat up. Cersei and Jaime came and sat beside him.

"What... what you told us earlier... " Cersei began.

_That's it_ , he thought. _She's going to tell me that I'm disgusting, that they hate me, that..._

"...that explains a few things," Jaime finished.

Tyrion raised an eyebrow, surprised. Had he been that indiscreet? Cersei and Jaime exchanged an amused look.

"Like the way you look at us sometimes... Or the number of times you hug us in a single day," Cersei said.

Embarrassed, he scratched the back of his head, running out of words.

"So... you don't hate me? "he asked in a very shy voice.

Jaime seemed scandalized.

"Hate you? How could we hate you? You mean everything to us."

"Everything..."

Maybe he meant _everything_ to them, but not the way he would have liked.

"Tomorrow... tomorrow we'll pretend that nothing happened," he sighed, resigned.

Once again, only silence answered him. Yet, as he was about to cry again, more melancholic than ever, Jaime put a hand on his cheek. Their eyes met.

Then, very gently, he gave a gentle kiss to Tyrion. Tyrion's eyes widened in amazement.

When Jaime moved aside, smiling timidly, Cersei pressed Tyrion's hand and gave him a kiss too.

"I... I..." he stammered as his heart pounded in his chest, more alive than ever.

"Let's sleep, shall we?" Jaime cut him off. "It's been a long and emotional evening."

He got up to go and turn off the light while Cersei dragged Tyrion under the comforter and buried her face in his neck. Their brother joined them just seconds later and pressed himself against Tyrion before kissing him on the temple.

"Let's sleep," he repeated. "We... we can talk tomorrow and see... see what the future holds for us."

The twins gave him one last kiss before closing their eyes, but Tyrion doubted he would be able to fall asleep. The melancholy that was poisoning his life had turned into a sweet euphoria that ran through his veins and drew a broad smile on his lips.

He didn't know what was going to happen the next day, but actually, it didn't matter.

He was now in paradise, no more and no less, in the arms of Cersei and Jaime, his two soulmates, and he had never been happier in his life.

Nothing else mattered.


End file.
